why I've been depressed this year...
-I can't stay calm.
-I can't stop worrying for my friends.
-I'm paranoid.
-I can't help but feel concerned for some people.
-The future and past scares me....I'm scared to know what will happen tomorrow..something bad might happen..
-I'm the runt of the litter in my family.
-I want to see my closest friends happy, but it never happens..
-My friends in RL judge me for liking Alvin.
-I'm the outcast online and offline.
-I'm overlooked.
-I'm not famous.
-I'm lonely.
-I want a boyfriend, but I can't have one </3
-I get yelled at a lot.
-I'm scared to speak up for myself most of the time.
-I'm the "pet" of the group.
-No one really cares about me.
-I have a LOW self-esteem.
-I want to draw better, but I can't.
-I blame last summer for the start of this depression. It screwed me up so badly...
-I wish some people knew my true feelings.
-I bottle up my feelings because I feel if I tell them to some people in RL, they'll look at me like I have issues.
-I feel that I can't have some REAL time for myself without my parents bothering me about something.
-I feel left out.
-I want to be like the others, but it's so hard to fit it.
-I've been bullied in school for so many years. I never EVER had real friends until 8th grade. I'm a sophomore now, though..
-I feel that I screw up too much.
-I make life hard for some people.
-I've made my mom cry so many times..
-I want someone to love me for who I am and not for who they want me to be.
-I am selfish.
-I am arrogant.
-I am envious.
-I am bratty.
-I am loud.
-I feel that I never should've been here in the first place.
-.....I hate winter 2010..I think THAT really started my depression...summer 2011 only made it worse..
-My Dad has a hard time trusting my friends Courtney and Katelyn...he feels that they might be "predators", when they are NOT.
-I feel that people are irritated of me and my obsessions.
-I WANT to show how I really feel like sometimes, but I feel that I'll be judged.
-I have a big mouth.
-I have made stupid mistakes and the past and I'm still being beat down for it.
-No guy has ever loved me nor will they ever will.
-I am WILLING to meet Courtney face-to-face, but...I'm having such a hard time on WHEN to meet her....her, me, and my mom are planning it out..
-I wish I could be part of the big, cool groups.
-People keep telling me about how they love some guy so much...it's breaking my heart, because I'll never know how love feels like </3
-I've been made fun of at school for liking Alvin.
-One of my friends in RL almost forced me to enjoy yaoi(it was really disturbing)...
-I was beat up to a bloody pulp by some guy my age when I was only in 1st grade....most terrifying expirience I've had...</3
-I've been sent to the hospital because of my depression.
-My RL friend, Mariah, is partially the blame to that.
-I feel alone when none of my friends talk to me.
-I am forgetful.
-I am stupid.
-I am the worst daughter in the whole world.
-I am lazy.
-I say stupid things.
-I criticize my sister for no good reason when she sings...
-I have such a bad temper.
-I am stubborn.
-I can't seem to listen.
-I feel that everyone hates me.
-I have been tempted to hurt myself on purpose once.
-If Alvin was a human boy, I'd probably go out with him. But too bad, he isn't even real.
-I feel that I'm greedy.
-I say insults about myself. And they're true.
......
.......
.............and so much more....wow...65 reasons so far.... ._."
`anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
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You are never alone. To be honest, I'm very depressed myself..I just hide it I guess.
There may be bad things happening, and the past and future can seem frightening sometimes.
Last year, a week after my birthday, I had to go into a Mental Hospital. I was forced to stay there for 6 months. I was forced to eat otherwise I could not see my family.. I am always afraid I will end up away from home again.
I get so angry with myself sometimes. I've got a few carpet burns, and I get called an 'Idiot' because of it. By my own mother.
_Gah, enough about me._
What I'm trying to say is, the world is harsh, and you may feel like nobody understands..but you are NEVER alone.
-I can't stop worrying for my friends.
-I'm paranoid.
-I can't help but feel concerned for some people.
-The future and past scares me....I'm scared to know what will happen tomorrow..something bad might happen..
----
Try to find a way to ground yourself when you get nervous.
-I'm the runt of the litter in my family.
----
Hey. That doesn't mean anything! Think of Wilbur from Charlotte's Web! Or even my dog! She was the runt. She almost died. Nobody wanted her. And she is one dog that I love to death.
-My friends in RL judge me for liking Alvin.
----
That's just cruel. They aren't your friends, then. You need to find some nicer, real people.
-I want to draw better, but I can't.
----
Yes, you can! It's hard to see improvement. Perhaps you should stay away from looking at your old art for a while. You'll see how much you've improved after keeping yourself from looking back.
-I'm lonely.
-I wish some people knew my true feelings.
-I feel alone when none of my friends talk to me.
----
I'm always there for you.
In fact, send me a note now. I want to talk to you.